I was lost last night. Usually, I'd work on knorbi and watch football. But since I've pretty much mothballed knorbi in favor of the thing that's been eating at my ass for so long, I didn't know what I should be doing. So I starting reading a book called Art & Fear. It's in the same vein as Ignore Everybody, but on a deeper level.
I also experimented with a thing on my phone called Impaktor. It's a cool little app that turns finger drumming on a desk or whatever surface into tones. It's like a drum machine, but cooler. I have no idea how to incorporate it into anything, but it's fun to fuck around with.
I woke up around 7 am, feeling the effects of ingesting horrible food at the fair yesterday. My girlfriend said it best as we were walking out, "I feel like I'm covered in oil." Well, all that oil came rushing out of my body this morning, like a firehouse of filth and shame. And the food wasn't nearly as good as I remember it. And it was fucking expensive. I don't know how all those poor people afford to take their entire family there for a day.
I took the dogs for a good walk, got home and ate some leftover soup and some chicken sausages that I think are delicious. They're the kind that promises that there's no bad stuff in them. Who fucking knows. I don't trust anything that comes in a box and/or comes out of a grocery store. Basically, anything that uses marketing tricks to get you to buy it, I'm skeptical.
I drove to work and started work on changing some bad habits I've formed while I'm here. Habits that have caused my waist line to get bigger and the scale to read a higher number than it used to. We'll see how it plays out, but all my other attempts to change the habit have failed so far.
The modern world has changed the way, or rather, changed our options regarding where and when we work. For some jobs, not all jobs. Mostly the office jobs where a majority of the work goes through a computer.
We have the technology now to work from pretty much anywhere in the world as long as there's an Internet connection available. And in some cases, you don't even need the interweb. You might at some point, but the work doesn't have to be performed while connected (unless all you do is answer stupid emails, in which case, I'm sorry).
So it shouldn't be a big deal for a company to allow their employees to work remotely, right? Fucking right, but a lot of companies don't like it, because they lose a little bit of control over someone who is working remotely. The boss doesn't have the ability to walk by your cube, look in and see what you're doing, and in the process make you feel uncomfortable. Like, "oh shit, I better get back to work because there's the boss." When you're at home or wherever, you can look at the facebook on the Internet, do something else in the house, like dishes, or cook, or clean, or whatever, without worrying about the boss looming over your shoulder. And those moments when you are performing work have a lower possibility of getting interrupted by other office sloths, who seem to make a living walking around chit chatting with everyone all day.
Companies don't like allowing you that kind of freedom. The boss is the person in control, the person responsible for making sure you get your work done. And a lot of places feel the only way to ensure you get your work done is to have a boss in the vicinity who can crack the whip if you get distracted.
I think this has to do with the old way of thinking that equates time spent on a task to the amount of work produced. 8 hours equals X amount of output, where X is some arbitrary number the boss decides is the standard, probably based on how much money you make.
We all know this is fucking stupid. I've known people who spend 8 hours a day slaving away hard on a task, and I spend an hour working and get just as much done. Not that I'm smarter or more competent or whatever. It has nothing to do with that and everything to do with focus. 8 hours is a ridiculous amount of time to expect someone to remain focused. I'd say 2 hours is just about the upper threshold of human attention span before a break is needed. For me, it's about 45 minutes to an hour before I need a little break. And I can't keep it up for an 8 hour time span. No one can. Fuck these old school assholes.
There's also a more sinister thing going on. It's not about getting work done, it's about control. When you're away from the job, you tend to not think about the boss and his bullshit. You feel somewhat free. And that makes bosses uncomfortable, because they feel like they need to make sure you know they're in charge. And the only way to do that is to keep you in their presence, to walk by your cube from time to time, just reminding you that you're the slave and they're the master.
Maybe I'm fucking crazy. Maybe my company and your company and all the companies and bosses on Earth have nothing but the best intentions towards their employees. But I suspect there's a deep mistrust between the employers and employees that will never be solved as long as we have the whole corporate structure hierarchy thing going on.
You'll never convince me that my company and my bosses don't hate me. They hate me because they have to pay me, and have to babysit me, and have to provide me with equipment to do the work they pay me to do, and think they have to keep a strong management structure to keep me in my place, and they have to provide me a place to perform my work, a controlled environment where I become a resource in their machine as soon as I walk in the door.
I accept this role. It keeps me just on the edge of comfort. I know that at any moment, this whole job thing could come to an end and I'll have to get out there and find another. And I'm fine with that because it keeps me on my toes. I just wish it was a little bit more acceptable to work remotely, that's all.
Fantasy football was pretty good to me this week. I love you Fan Duel, at least this week.